Does inspiration ever actually leave us? I don't believe so. I believe that after knocking on your door for years on end with nobody answering and letting it in, it eventually stops knocking- but it doesn't leave. It just waits outside like a dog in the rain, patiently waiting to be remembered. 

I think it's safe to say that we would all like to live more inspired, passionate lives. Most of us, at one point or many, have wild dreams of adventures of a lifetime. My guess is that a very small percentage of people actually live out these dreams while the rest of us either forget about them all together and find pleasure in a mundane life, or they continue to dream but also continue to do nothing. Which one are you? 

The problem is that it is so easy to get daunted by the process of inspiration. This morning I woke up to my Note From the Universe reading:

We tend to make mountains out of molehills, it is a really wonderful loophole that our minds have created so that when we get lazy and decide to back out of our dreams we have a good excuse, because it was all just too much to do right now. Then we either shuffle on down to the next inspiration we get, or we continue to moan and groan about the last one and how we really truly wanted it so bad. Let's be frank, you didn't want it so bad because if you did you wouldn't have given up.

So start small, or start big. What.ever. Just start. Dream, Dream big. Then dream again and make it even bigger. You see, we create glass ceilings for ourselves a lot- it's another one of those mental loopholes that creates a safety blanket- why reach the stars when you can just look at them? NO- let's touch the stars. Once you start dreaming you need to act! It may not be fast or intense, but it does need to happen. 

A big problem is that people start working towards their dreams and about halfway through feel totally under impressed with what they have achieve thus far.  You thought that you would have been so much further along then you are right now... thus starts the mental bullying. You convince yourself that you are failing, then you actually do fail. Free will and choice is a very sensitive thing. 

The other big problem is that you get lost in the labyrinth of ideas and work and forget about the gem that you are fighting for at the center. You are at the start, you see exactly what you want, you start running full-force into the labyrinth, totally psyched about your gem, then you start to get tired, then distracted then the next thing you know you are looking around and all you see is shrubbery and have no clue what you were running for in the first place. 

So be mindful of your dream- put it in a glass case in the center of the room so that you can see it every day. Make a plan and move deliberately through it, reminding yourself that every day is a success if you at least thought of your dream. That's right, you don't always have to do something for your dream, but you do have to at least keep the process in mind every day. It's like a good marriage, you don't need to go on a hot date every night of the week, but you do need to hold him/her within your heart every day.  Similarly, you need a good support system to keep you on track when things are tricky. So talk about your dream, find people to hold you accountable. Don't allow your tricky mind to create another loophole of "well, if I don't tell anyone about my dream, then if I fail to attain it nobody will know." Talk about it, talk about every little step you have taken and what is next. Get excited about it, allow others to get excited for you.

Most importantly, dear friend, it doesn't matter how big or small it is, what matter's is that it matters to you. If this dream will make you feel a little bit more whole, then it is always worth it to work towards. 

I hate to gripe... but I'm griping, because sometimes there is only a fine line standing between you and a three year old's temper tantrum kicking and screaming in aisle 5. Yes, it's been a rough day. Have you moved to a new place recently? If so, you probably are very aware of how challenging it is. It's ping pong between being entirely excited about being in a new place, doing new things, meeting new people and dealing with all the minute details and glitches of moving your life and everything to do with your life to a new place. It's been fantastic thus far, I'm back at the beach which is amazing, I'm with my sister which is fantastic, I have a whole new market to spread my work. It feels so good, so fresh. But then there's the bullshit: changing health insurance (amidst a health problem), changing addresses, changing banks, registering my business (nobody likes going to town hall). Automatic bill pay seems like the greatest gift, until you have to change everything to a new bank, then it's your greatest nightmare. I have a bank check waiting to deposit in my business bank account, which I can't open until I register my business, which I can't register until I have a lease and proof of residency, a lease which I can't sign until I have a check to pay the deposit with, checks that I have been waiting for from the bank for the past two weeks. It's like I am trying to run with 50 lb weights around my ankles- or should I say 150 lb people from the administrative units that I am working with.

So my life has become ping pong, one hour I'm pouring new creative energy into my business (love), next thing I'm on the phone for an hour with the insurance company explaining to them that I want to pay them, but I can't because I currently have no bank account (hate), then I break and go for a walk to the beach (sweet relief), then come back home to another bill that cannot be paid (wtf). I've been going with it though, continuously meditating on the fact that this is just human problems that need to be dealt with in order to get to the sweeter side of life. Then my car starts making a funny noise, but for the next few days I have no other ride than myself, much less having absolutely no idea who to call. The sound quickly goes from kinda-bad to horrible. Even someone like me who has no clue where to start with cars (I know where the tires and the engine are. That's a good start, right?) now realizes that something is terribly wrong. So someone finally checks it out and declares that this is a bad situation, i.e. an expensive situation. Wanting to be proactive I immediately run into the house and look up phone numbers to call. Yay- they can get me in right now. I'll be there in ten minutes. Within a few minutes of hanging up the phone I hear this loud machine going outside. I try to open the door only to see that they are power washing the apartments, my hall first, then work their way down, I live on the third floor. So I proceed to pace the apartment for 45 minutes listening to the power washer, inhaling the bleach and other chemicals they are spray, desperately trying to get out just so that I can deal with my other problem of an un-drivable car with a major problem that is going to cost a pretty penny to fix at a time that I don't have any work.

Does anyone else think it's somewhat humorous that my breaks are shot so I can't really "stop," yet I'm stuck in my apartment so I can't really "go" either? Wtf. Energetically these two weeks have felt like I am in a stand-still. First I thought it was all in my head, but now it's a reality. All I can say is, I hope I've paid the piper and can finally pass "Go" and get on with my life. I need brakes to stop, but I also want to move forward... with speed... towards AwesomeTown... waiving both middle fingers at car-problems-ville, knee-problems-ton, bankers-burg. See-ya suckers, I've got better places to head to!